How to Talk to Boys

How to Talk to Boys Step 1: Don’t talk to them. Just don’t do it. Talk to them? Please, if there’s one thing I know for sure, it is this: I have no game. I realized a long time ago that I am terrible at flirting. Mainly because my version […]

Happy Valentine’s Day To Me!

I’m just going to say it: Valentine’s Day is dumb. Do we really need a special day to appreciate our significant others (and rub it in the faces of those who don’t)? I feel like the only people who really care about it are people who aren’t in relationships. I […]

Shopping For A Little Black Dress

“I think I’m going to be single for the rest of my life,” she said matter-of-factly, with only the slightest hint of frustration. It wasn’t the first time I’d heard her say that. She said that same exact thing, word for word, about two hours earlier when we were waiting […]

Fifty First Dates

Please don’t confuse this post with the cute romantic comedy by the same name starring Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore. This is nothing like that. Based on my recent experience, there is very little that is cute or romantic about modern dating. At best, there’s comedy. At it’s worst, it […]

The Beginning of the End: Part III

“Coffee? I could drink some coffee.” Now, I’m not super thrilled to admit this part: I got in his car. I wish I could tell you what I was thinking, but clearly, I wasn’t. I wasn’t sober. Not drunk by this point, but obviously not on top of my game. […]

The Beginning of the End: Part II

So, where were we? Ah yes. I was on a date, in a bar, with a gentleman who had recently tried to give up drinking. And I have a hardcore brunch buzz. Right. This is my life, Ladies and Gentleman, and at that moment, I wasn’t loving it. Less than […]

The Beginning of the End: Part I

The date that made me quit dating…the first time. Because to be clear, I eventually tried online dating (and quit trying online dating) a second time, but only because my therapist told me to. It was a long, weird afternoon spent in the company of a stranger who said THE […]

I’m Sorry…WHAT?

While we are on the subject of online dating, I have a few more things to say. We spent so much time talking about the dos and don’ts of profile pictures last time, I feel like I’d be remiss if I didn’t address the subject of online dating communications. What […]

A Picture Says A Thousand Words. And Then Some.

Historically, I have been able to find ridiculous, disastrous romantic entanglements without the aid of the internet. In fact, I had a pretty good run. But I guess there comes a point in adult life where you kind of only know the people you know and the opportunities to meet […]